Cumbrian Separatist Campaign Policies
Manifesto Aspirations
Now we're all used to political parties making campaign pledges that don't seem to quite come true in the way we expected, so we in the Cumbrian Separatist will instead list our non-binding aspirations.
- Introduction of the Citizen's Income
- Tolls on the M6 through Cumbria for all drivers not stopping and spending money
- Constituency meetings on The Paddock and/or a completed East Stand Suite at Brunton Park on matchdays, with pies and XL Cheese Crisps charged to Parliamentary Expenses
- All my office staff will be Carlisle United fans
- build a new Hadrian's Wall to the north of Carlisle as a tourist attraction, with splurge guns on top just in case the tourists get too rowdy.
- Campaign for CUFC TV via FreeView. Across the whole UK, of course.
- Cumbria to have its own Cumbrian Flag, to be flown proudly from all Cumbrian public buildings.
- Cumbrians to attend at least 12 sporting events involving Cumbrian teams per year.
- The two Cumbria Days will be holidays for Cumbrians, involving food, drink and socialising.
- Cumbrian dialects to be preserved, taught and not made fun of.
- Teaching the "Way of the Winja", the traditional way in which Cumbrians moan about everything.
- Sign posts also to be inscribed in local dialect as with english
- Cumbrian dialect to be actively encouraged in schools as a focal point of local identity
- Secondary home for outsiders to have prices frozen and offered to locals first
- Mineral exploration to assist cumbria to become self sufficient
- EU Grants to be applied for to assist local industry and get the unemployed back to work
Where does the Candidate stand.....?
well for Carlisle United home matches, I stand on The Paddock. As far as how my mind works, well the following two pages will cover that:
